'A real man'

'A real man', a statement that I witness far too often and this concept really disheartens me. Please tell me, what is a 'real' man? 

This issue is so prominent in our society and also in the gay community. This I find surprising because it seems to contradict the idea of freedom and expression of who you are. Which is supposed to be what the LGBTQ community preaches. This ideal of being who you are is a fundamental part of the community and the community is being tarnished by this phrase being used by gay men and this way of thinking.

The concept of masculinity has been a problem in our society for generations, there is a reason why the highest cause of death in men is suicide and that is due to the perception of man which is placed on men from day one of their lives and they can't cope with the burden. It's incredibly worrying. 

The two common phrases I seem to come across are "I want a real man" and "A man who acts like a man" which to me are ridiculous as what actually constitutes as a real man? I'm not apologising when I say that all beings that identify as men are men. Whether they are a straight or gay, 'traditionally masculine' or 'traditionally feminine', trans, no matter what, they are men, it's that simple. 

This issue is important to me as when I was younger, I was often referred to as a 'girl', which I don't see as an insult in the slightest. I was called this because I didn't fit the stereotypical mould of what a 'boy' was; I played with 'girls' toys, the majority of my friends were female, I didn't like football, the list goes on. This used to hurt me as a young child but now I understand how ignorant those people were and I want to spread the message that everyone who identifies as male is a real man. I don't want another young boy being told he's not a man because his interests don't fit society's mould. I want him to be free and explore what he's into without being judged. This also applies to older boys and men too, we should be able to express ourselves however we want without being deemed not a real man. This conversation needs to happen, if you're a guy have a conversation about this with a man you're close to and get this issue around. 

This is me being really hopeful, but I hope that maybe through spreading the message maybe there will be a few less bios on tinder saying 'Real men only'. Let's set it as a little goal for the year. 

This sort of post is quite different to my usual posts but this year I really want to get more involved with world and LGBTQ issues.

George x